The Mom of the Girl who thinks too Much

With the PSLE around the corner, I've the privilege of talking to a few mommies who have kids sitting for the PSLE. While most mommies are worried about their kids being "too cool" about the exams, I was silently wishing: How I wish Ariel can be normal! Being cool and unperturbed about exams, etc., just like other normal kids.

However, I know if that really happens, it'll really be a miracle.

Extremes are never a good thing. Ariel is someone who worries so much, such that she can lose sleep over an excursion; or on the day that she's supposed to be something "extraordinary" (like visiting a Primary school and buying her own food), she'll get a stomachache. As her mom, I can't deny that I worry constantly about her sleeplessness, her inability to take failures and even how she copes with peers who might see her as a goody-two-shoes!

So, instead of a girl who thinks too much, you now have a mom who worries too much.

However, after learning from a friend on how to raise a child who's very self-motivated, and a perfectionist, like Ariel, I've come to realise a few things I should change first, in order to help her:

• BE PATIENT. I need to be patient to listen to her worries and thoughts, even if they make me wanna pull my hair out at times =P
• WEAR A POKER FACE AND FAKE A POKER VOICE. I need to wear a poker face and not let my slightest frown make her doubt herself. Being a HSC, she takes criticism very seriously. I need to learn how to manage my tone of voice too, to not sound frustrated at her worries.
• TELL MYSELF RESULTS AND EXAMS IS JUST A PIECE OF PAPER. [quote from my friend :)] I need to focus more on the learning process rather than results. I need to manage my own expectations in the midst of my own peer pressure, especially "peer pressure" from friends whose kids are good in almost everything.
• PROVIDE OPPORTUNITIES FOR HER TO FAIL. In the past, I've always thought that by encouraging her to try new things, I need to let her feel good about herself, or to let her win. However, I've come to realise that kids need to fail sometimes, in order to succeed in life.
• BE MORE LOVING TOWARDS THOSE UNLIKE MYSELF. This last point is of utmost importance to me as I must admit I tend to draw near to people who are more like myself. Unfortunately, Ariel is my complete opposite. I certainly need to be more understanding towards her, her fears, her worries and even her habits which can be so different from mine.

With the above, I now feel more confident of handling the future. If you happen to read this blog entry, wish me luck! ;)